Doggy Style


My German Sheppard Velvet is in heat. I meant to get her fixed, and I missed the window. Her brother, Thunder, has been going nuts! He’s like a teenage boy at the Playboy Mansion! We have been carefully separating them, but they are so attached to each other that they howl when they’re apart. They have never been apart and have never wanted each other more than they do now. Of course my neighborhood has had it with the noise, but what can you do?!?

Some friends came over, who were unaware of the horny situation, and put them together in our dog run. Before we knew it, Rain came running to David and I…..
“Mama, Papa!!!!! Come quick! You have to see this!” She screamed.

Now, if you have ever seen dogs having sex, then you know it is NOT a pretty sight. 

We found them in the dog run, stuck together, butt-to-butt, heads facing opposite directions. Rain was cracking up, and yelled, “Mama, Papa, why is Thunder’s foot stuck up Velvet’s BUTT?"

David and I have not laughed that hard since I can remember. The funny thing is that Rain found it more hilarious than confusing.

It’s not often that I am at a loss for words with my children. I have to say that this time I was saved by her hilarious misinterpretation of what could have been an early intro to the “birds and the bees.” I didn’t even try to explain. I simply said, “That’s really funny isn’t it?” We laughed together; in fact we are all still laughing about it.

Explaining sex to my 4-year-old is something I am not prepared to do. Explaining the “foot in the butt” may have been even harder. I thought about discussing the fact that they weren’t even enjoying it, in fact they looked quite miserable, in hopes to down play the “first time” curiosity. But that is a conversation more suited for my Tween. So I chose comedy over reality and we laughed all the way to the vet days later.




Leave a Reply