Mom's Case of the Mondays

by Beth Pocalyko

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Mondays... just another day.

When you have kids, Mondays are just like Thursdays, and Saturdays. It is the same thing every day. What happened to me this Monday could have happened on any other day of the week. But it happened on a Monday - so I easily wanted to shout "I hate Mondays" like the rest of the world.

I blame watching the movie Looper. If you haven’t seen it, there is a crazy kid that throw tantrums that literally can kill people. My husband and I related to the killer tantrums that come from our almost two-year-old Chase.  We began to call him Chuckie or Rainmaker from the movie. I think watching the movie was a foreshadowing for what was to come.

Waking up Monday morning, my son Nicholas had a fever, and a bad cough. So no school for him. I thought it would be a relaxing morning, while we wait for his doctor’s appointment instead of rushing to make it to school.

While the kids watched morning cartoons, I got on the elliptical to work out. Starting the week right, I thought! After 15 minutes (but already working up a sweat), Nicholas went on a coughing attack. He ran to the bathroom, and on his way, while passing me on the elliptical at the same time I was getting off to help him, he threw up on me and the carpet!  “Sweat and Chunks Happy Monday” I texted my sister-in-laws one of our many group texts of the day.

But I cleaned Nicholas up, gave him some ginger ale, put on a new workout outfit, and got right back on the elliptical like nothing ever happened ! Workout time over and time for a smoothie. Like anything I go to eat, I should just assume by now that no matter how much food Chase has already eaten he will assume my meal or snack is his. I sometimes eat my turkey sandwich for lunch hiding in my room because I sometimes just don’t want to share my food!

Today was different, after wanting my smoothie that I gave to him, I went to get another cup for myself. When I return Chase (who was about to turn in Chuckie) wanted both cups. I said calmly “No Chase, this is your cup,  this is Mommy’s. I knew what was about to happen I saw it in his face. But I was not quick enough to grab his cup before BAMMM he threw the Smoothie all over me.

Throw up and now Smoothie on me. What is next?  I have 35 minutes to shower, dress, blow dry my hair, and get everyone out the door. Chase goes in timeout, and I go to get ready. Before walking out the door, my sick Nicholas sensed his mom was stressed and it wasn’t even 11 am.  He put on his coat and shoes without me asking, and even got his little brothers coat and shoes on. Something he has never done before, or even knew he could do. (But note to self he will be my new helper with that!)

The doctor’s office was so busy, I was trying to activate our new insurance card and Chase wouldn’t let go of my wallet.  I was afraid for a meltdown if I took it from him. So I just waited until he was distracted by another kid in the waiting room that he wanted to play with. Meltdown averted, and card activated.

As we waited for the doctors Chase was freaking out. He hates the doctors and wanted to get out of there. I couldn’t have told him anymore that we were there for his big brother. He just did not get it.  We waited he screamed, and cried.  I was doing my best to distract him with my phone, pictures on the wall, and books. It was 20 degrees outside, and I was literally sweating trying to keep this little guy calm.

We are sent to the x-ray place right next door after an hour at the pediatricians.  I knew I was pushing it because Chase was getting hungry. But I wanted to get this over with and get home.

The place was empty they said it would be as fast as I filled out the paper work for Nicholas to be seen. Great! While I tried to fill out papers, Nicholas started to get antsy and started running around, Chase was obsessed with the door he wanted to open and slam shut. Another meltdown happened when I took him away from the door. I am about to just leave and just come back after lunch when the lady calls Nicholas back for his x-ray. Chase finally calms down.

On the way home I realized I have to feed these kids.   I walk into a local pizza place,“I will have a cheese pizza to go and a shot of tequila I ordered. The pizza guy laughed. I was kind of serious.

After I put Chase down for a nap, and set Nicholas up with a movie, I finally was able to do some work. Everything was relaxed and calm. I could breathe.

It was not long before the UPS guy pulled up. Nicholas and I both quickly run to the door. He thinks it is new jacket we ordered him, and I am trying to stop the UPS guy from ringing the bell and waking up the baby.  Just as I get to the door I hear Nicholas say “That was rude you didn’t have to throw it at me.” It was raining, so the UPS guy - instead of walking up the driveway and to the front door - just threw the package. I couldn’t stop laughing. And I needed that laugh.

Sometimes days like this Monday, make me miss the days when I didn’t have kids. As much as I love them, I sometimes miss when my days weren’t focused around meltdowns, doctors’ appointments, scheduling fun activities for the them, and what I am going to feed everyone.... the list goes on and on.  But then on days like today, I also think of my friend who is struggling to have kids and always says "I just want the chance to know how I will handle these funny mom situations."  And at the end of the day it is funny! I respond - "lots of WINE!"

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