- At Home
I think we all know a girl or two that got pregnant for the wrong reasons. Women who thought a baby would help re-connect them with their partner, “bring them closer together” and kak like that.
I always thought that notion sounded a bit off-side, but it wasn't until I had a relationship wrecker of my own (child) that I fully understood the magnitude of having a baby, and the metamorphosis your relationship goes through.
One night in particular stands out above all the other awful sleepless nights. I was sitting on the edge of my bed jamming cabbage leaves into my disgusting nursing bra when my husband walked in and asked "What are you doing?” I began to cry and answered: "Who would put themselves through this kind of hell to 'save their marriage'?"
I couldn't stop thinking about the countless women out there who think a child will pull their relationship out of the toilet. Babies take over your life... how are you going to save a relationship and look after a baby? The two are at opposing ends.
If you want a child and you think you can get your partner "to come around" by getting pregnant and having one, you're wrong. DO NOT DO THIS. If you want to get your relationship back on track, or even see if it has a chance ask yourself the following:
Does no sex, cracked, ugly, massive nipples, a baby that cries at random (but more often at night), a big ass, a swishy stomach, pooh diapers, a generally bitchy attitude towards everything, no sleep, a bag lady approach to fashion (that is, big comfortable pants, your husband's t-shirts) sound appealing? Or sexy? Does this sound like the person you were before kids? (if yes, then you have got serious problems).
The only thing you can take care of after a baby is a baby.
Dennis Quaid said it best in the film In Good Company. On being in the perfect marriage - "You just pick the right one to be in the foxhole with....”
There you go, girls. If you've picked the wrong dude, move on. Do not decide to procreate with the arse.