The Secret to a Happy Marriageby ModernMom Staff
In this day and age, a happy marriage seems harder to come by than a four leaf clover. In fact, considering the divorce rate is at 50 percent and the reality that there are plenty of unsatisfied couples out there, a happy marriage sometimes seems like an unattainable ideal.
But, we know that while the stats seem scary, there are plenty of couples out there who are truly making it work. They’re in satisfying, loving, committed and successful marriages. So, we asked our Twitter followers and Facebook Friends, what’s your secret to a happy marriage?
Here are some of your responses (sorry if we didn't use your response this time, there were some repeats!)
@Diapers_n_Heels: Open lines of communication! A MUST!
@ninjaMommers: Adequate time spent as a family and then also spent as a couple. Once the kids are in bed we make sure we spend time to connect. Oh and him picking up his dirty socks helps too...But thats something we have yet to perfect yet ;)
@laurawieking: We each have our own accounts for personal use and hobbies. Household gets paid first. It takes money out of the equation.
@hippermamas: I always take a second each day, and try to imagine how it would be if he was not here.
@Jess_Cook30: listen to each other! Its my anniversary today! :)
@thepinkboss: Accepting your spouse for who they are and not trying to change them
@WomenOnTheFence: Lotsa sex! Haha.
@lieslmama: happy marriage = sharing the load and fiercely allowing/encouraging each other to maintain own identities and interests
@queensmom: communication, honesty, trust, patience, and love. It is that simple.
@EmilyKrbec: Being silly! If you can't be ridiculous, can you really be comfortable at all? For us, laughter has a way of making everything ok
@silmy_doll: Stay always positive, have agreements in everything and spend quality time together!
@Main_Momma: My husband and I take a date night once a month (sometimes twice). & we have a rule: "no parent talk, It's our time"
@MyCreativeEscap: Making sure we have "non Kid time", both as a couple, and individuals. 4 hrs just for me makes me fall in love all over again.
@samnickmike: having a solid base in our relationship prior to marriage and children, which began in high school…
@phatheadsmom: communication and God. Have to be in my marriage or it just stops working.
@J_Amy: key to a happy marriage in my opinion; is to fall in love w/your spouse over and over again...
@1736lene: I chose to have children on my own and let happy mariage wait till later in life
@MelD_blessed: choose your battles wisely, let the little ones slide by but stick to your guns for the right ones :)
@lsaundra: Don't be too intense. If you care too much you'll be too critical and too sensitive putting more meaning to things than wise.
@CallMeMrsSarvis: God and sacrifice. also, we made a pact to NEVER say the "d" word.
@currentwoman: Communication!!!! That's #1 on our list
@rubyjewel: Spend a lot of time together as a family. Keep your private life private. Communicate. Have similar goals. Work in with each other.
@catarcori: Make yourself a priority. You’ll be a happier wife, mother. Also love what you have today, never live for materialism.
@jillhite: Never underestimate the power of fun! Always have something fun on your calendar. Remember the fun you had before.
@jessmoran28: a romantic, childless overnight getaway once every 6 months…
@carlenefranklin: The Three C’s: Commitment, Compromise and the big one Communication, tell each other you love them every day…
@dianalgraham: being friends first with my husband
@tipilynn: tell your partner one thing you appreciate about him every day
@chunkierunner: sometimes happiness in marriage comes when you let go of your need for control and you take a leap of faith in your spouse
@wrangler_mama: ours is a tried & true one…talk, trust & laugh. We have 5 kids and more in love than ever.
@joevirgintmazgay: leverage…pick your battles but maintain leverage.
@kathycrinion: There’s no secret. Just find time daily to remember why you fell in love with your partner in the first place, 20 yrs. married.
@AGreenTeam: Married 39 years. Even if we’re mad at bedtime, we touch toes to let one another know we still love them…
Morgan Weinbrecht Holsinger: We laugh, joke, and pull good pranks on each other! it keeps the flirting going. Never take anything too seriously. :)
Dasha Utyuzh: There is none - you love each other, truly and unconditionally... and never forget that.
Michelle McDowell: I think the trick to a happy marriage is making sure you're right for each other Before you tie the knot! After that, it's easy.
Jody Wielgosz: Having God at the centre choosing to follow His ways learning how to handles storms and a passion and dedicated choose to choose to Love in the way my spouse needs it during the storms. It’s easy to love someone or anyone when life is good. Trials and tribulation is inevitable its how you handle those times both collectively and as an individual.
Marisa Mackie: My favorite is a quote from a family therapist that visited us last year at our congregation: " you have to accept that the other person is not right, not wrong, just different"
Thanks for all of your responses! You've proved that a happy marriage is possible -- with some work!