Jill a.k.a Jill Simonian
Jill Simonian is a television host/reporter and mom of two girls under the age of 3. She chronicles her quest to keep life focused and fabulous after babies on her blog, TheFabMom.com. She can frequently be spotted on HLN, Hallmark Channel and ReelzChannel.
Jill Simonian Author Alias
I am RIGHT in it people. Princesses, princesses everywhere. My newly-minted 3 year old is obsessed, and my 19-month old is following suit. (I guess the apple doesn't fall far from the tree... I literally thought I was Snow White when I was five. And Lord help you if you disputed me.)
Let's not pretend to be something we're not. Most all clever moms lie to their children (especially to toddlers) at some point or another just to get things done. I do. Not ashamed to admit it. This chocolate isn't what you think it is, it's really mommy's medicine and tastes really yucky. I'm going to take my nap right now too.
Since I started my adventure in motherhood back in 2010, I've always had a goal to keep things "strong" -- physically, emotionally and mentally. Don't get me wrong, I've had my share of mommy-meltdowns, but I remember admiring how strong my own mom was raising my sister and me.
How old is too old to have a baby? Is there such a thing as being past our female prime in our progressive age of egg-freezing technology and scientific possibilities of surrogacy? Some say yes, some say no. The options for carrying and birthing a baby past the age of 35 teeters on controversial to some. Others don't understand the controversy at all.
Who has time to clean their house? (Crickets.) Does anyone clean their own home anymore? (Bigger and more obnoxiously-loud crickets now, at least with a lot of my busy friends.) Looks like I'm the only sucker.
Can someone please tell me when kids' birthday parties became mandatory reason for parents to have a carnival in their backyard?
The day I'd been dreading since I became a mom has finally come and gone. It took me two years to get there (as that's the age of my oldest), but I'm now here. I'm okay, minus some shots to my ego and a few silly tears I shed just to release the feeling. I'm told that most mostly-stay-at-home moms (and totally-stay-at-home-moms) go through this.
Are you "political?" I'm not. Never have been. I've voted in every election since I turned 18, but I'm not "political." (I'll admit, the most riveting thing I've done recently to affect society is expose hidden germs on TV).
Blame this recent New York Times article for what you're about to read. Let's talk baby weight. Gaining it, losing it, and how celebrities on covers of magazines make the rest of us feel bad. Correction: How they make *some people* feel bad.
What do you do for fun?
Shout out for summertime! How many moms wear bikinis? Raise your hand. How many moms wear bikinis that tie at the hips and back and neck, and wear these little sexy stringy numbers in front of their kids, their kids' friends and their kids' friends' parents?
I survived an over-the-top baby shower... thanks to a Hollywood stylist.
After having my second baby just a few weeks ago, I've now decided that my name officially sucks. How did this happen? I loooooooooved my name. I still love my name. But it just doesn't have the same magic anymore.
I think C-sections have gotten a bad rap. It's not the real way to have a baby. The recovery sucks. You'll always have a scar. True. True. True. But I don't care. Didn't the first time (a year and a half ago), don't this time (2 weeks away).
WARNING: Pregnant women around the world might want to gag me and lock me in a closet after reading this, but I can't hold it in any longer. What is up with the obsession of getting a Push-Present?
Guess what y'all? I've got a baby in my belly again.... and he/she has been there for almost 7 months.
Ah, the indoor play-gym. Wild colors. Bouncy things. Countless ways to lose yourself in all-things-kiddie. They seem to be popping up everywhere I turn (or maybe I'm just noticing them more). But if I may offer some wacky advice to moms who just might have the same twisted outlook on life as myself - If you see one, RUN AWAY! Run far, far away.
Who's a mean mommy? Me. And I'm kinda happy about it.
I recently hit a new low (or high, depending on how you look at it). I smuggled the last half of a margarita out of a Mexican restaurant after my one-year-old's restless tantrum at the table forced my husband and me to make a swift and early exit.
The modern mom's dilemma: would you ever work on the day of your child's birthday party?
As I write this, I'm getting ready to celebrate my baby girl's first birthday. (So soon?) Excitement, love and fulfillment runs through me to no end... a very different scenario than last year this same time. Last fall, I was weeks away from giving birth and seriously worrying about my underwear.
By now we've all heard, read and/or watched the controversy regarding Chaz Bono joining the cast of Dancing With The Stars, yes? He is the first transgender person to be cast in the show... and America is going crazy. Message boards, blogs and Twitter accounts are exploding with fury over this choice. Viewers are threatening to boycott the show to "teach ABC a lesson" and are lashing out at Bono online as though he's committed a horrific crime.
Excuse me for ranting, but I have no choice. This isn't personal, it's purely business. There are a few operating procedures concerning the business of Mommyhood that (in my opinion) need to be fixed. I say this, because I love us.
Recent choices have led me to wonder if I'm walking a fine line lately between sexy and slutty. Not too long ago, my sister texted me a picture of a clothing boutique's window display showcasing mannequins with minidresses on - alongside two baby strollers. Seeing it, I squealed with delight, and thought it was a fun and long-overdue display of the "new, sexy mom"...until my sis commented on the "slutty dresses" and questioned how and why any designer would create such a contradictory scene for a storefront window. Whoa. Reality check. As arguably appropriate as her opinion seemed, it was also strange for me to hear this from her (considering that my sister's past activities involve wearing miniskirts to church).
This is so much more than about shoes, ladies. Despite my commitment to "keep things fabulous" after having my baby, I found myself falling into an "I'm not in the mood for anything" type of mode the past few months...
It takes a certain dexterity. It's uncomfortable. It's complicated and gross... not to mention UNfabulous. But sometimes there's no other choice. That which won't kill you will make you stronger. Who knew that peeing in a McDonald's bathroom would make me feel so invincible?
"Mirror mirror on the wall, who's the fairest of them all?" My childhood obsession (Snow White) goes deeper than I thought. I've recently concluded that I'm raising a vain baby... and I don't want it any other way. She is fabulous, and (as her mom) I think she should know it.