Most parents do not want to admit that their child is displaying deviant behavior. But burying your head in the sand or denying that your child has a problem is not going to help. If your child is disruptive at home or at school, he may need your help to get him back on the right track.
Children who have no contact with their father display violent behavior in school more often than do children from two-parent homes, according to Wichita State University. At a minimum, providing your children with more supervision will produce a lower rate of deviant behavior.
The Best Parenting Style
The four types of parenting styles are authoritative, authoritarian, permissive and neglectful. The authoritative style produces the best outcomes regarding your children’s behavior. Parents who use the authoritative style tend to have children who are not disruptive, are successful academically and are responsible. To be authoritative, you are demanding but responsive. An authoritative discipline style is one that is supportive rather than punitive, according to the At Health website. Authoritative parents are assertive, but they are not intrusive and overbearing.
Other Parenting Styles
The parenting style that tends to produce the most deviant behavior in your child is the neglectful one. Neglecting your child can range from being unresponsive to her to rejecting her completely.
Permissive parents may think they are befriending their children and are avoiding conflict, but they are too lenient and do not require or produce mature behavior from their children.
Authoritarian parents have many rules, but they are unresponsive to their children. Although children of authoritarian parents may behave well at home and at school, they can suffer from lower self-esteem, lower social skills and depression, according to the At Health website.
Change Your Child’s Behavior
If your child is acting out in deviant ways, you must consistently punish the bad behavior. Consistency is key. If you sometimes discipline and sometimes don’t for the same behavior, you will confuse your child, and you will not change the deviant behavior. Introduce a positive behavior to replace the deviant behavior. Consistently punish the bad and consistently reward the good.
Ways to Discipline
Some parents may choose physical punishment, such as spanking. Although spanking may stop the bad behavior in the short term, it does not teach your child how to change his behavior. A better suggestion would be to use time-outs for small children–one minute for each year of your child’s age. For older children, you can use punishments that will take place in the future. If your daughter is expecting you to take her to the mall on Saturday, for example, tell her ahead of time that if she displays the bad behavior before Saturday that you will not take her to the mall. Be sure to reward the good behaviors, too.
- happy mother and boy image by Alina Isakovich from Fotolia.com