My Wednesdays are starting to feel like Fridays. After two long days at DWTS, I start to unwind mid-week and rest up for the rest of the craziness. Yesterday in the midst of my chaotic studio demands, I was doing a long, but very deep interview, for Shape magazine. Surprisingly it was less about my body and more about my head. I am shooting a cover this week, which has been a longtime wish of mine. I will be sharing inspirations from my book, philosophies, and of course what I do to stay in shape. The meat of the interview was about what I do to stay sane in this crazy business with the chaos of raising my blended family.
The writer asked me how I balance it all. Long after I finished our conversation, I was thinking about that very popular question. The truth is I really don’t believe in ‘balance’. As a younger mom, I use to strive for that. Today, I am more into managing the chaos if my life. There is never a day when all my kids are in harmony. There is ALWAYS one of them who has an issue, a challenge, an attitude, or an unfulfilled need. What I do now is embrace that, and do the best I can to make the most of even the difficult days. The writer said that my life looks like it is in order, pretty picture perfect, and wanted to know how I pull that off. I laughed inside, and giggled as I told her that I am thrilled that it appears that way, but that image is hardly realistic.
The truth is that if anyone took a look inside my personal life and what happens in the privacy of my home, I believe that it would look pretty similar to other families around the world. I am not talking about the professional and material stuff; I’m talking about the emotions, the sibling rivalry, the stress, the discipline and the juggling. What I have learned to do is to manage the chaos of my hectic life, let go the way I imagined my family life would be, and accept the challenges that roll in every day. Fortunately, I am use to it; I have learned to focus on the good things. Everything happens in waves; even the bad days roll in and go away. What I value most is that LOVE defines my family. It’s the one thing that we can count on and that keeps all of us close. “Life is not a fairytale, it is a reality show” – From The Naked Mom.
Last week, I left my son alone for 2 minutes. He came running upstairs with screaming sisters in tow, blood running down his finger, with a metal furniture staple jammed into his little finger. David and I calmly tried to pull it out. No chance! We immediately headed out to the ER. The doctor injected his finger and discovered that the staple was in the BONE! Poor guy…. We were pulling in the wrong direction, and it had bent. Shaya was so brave, despite being totally freaked out! The doctor was able to successfully remove it with no damage. It was crazy, scary and sad all at the same time. David and I did everything we could to stay calm for him, comfort his pain and assure him that all would be ok. Looking back now, I wish we could handle all dramatic situations that well. With kids, even an emotional heartache can be traumatic. I wish I could be so calm and patient in those moments too. What takes only a few minutes to create can often times be healed in a few moments as well. That’s my lesson to learn. Kind words and lots of TLC go a long way. Shaya is doing perfectly well now. He was a real superhero and so much stronger than I ever imagined.