Me Time

Isn’t it amazing how we give up so many important things in our lives when we become mothers, and we ignore even the crucial ones that may define us as women.

I have about 2 hours travel time each day to get to the set where we are shooting my show. Normally I would dread that, but these days it is so useful, grounding, and eye opening. I have been using that time to think, write, and sometimes even rest in silence to change gears before I walk into my house with 4 anxious children waiting for their many needs to be met. I’ve never had that time before to shift into the right space before taking on the many different roles that I play.

In the early morning hours…

today being 4:30am, I enjoyed the drive into work, no one on the road, darkness, peace, and I was able to think about my own feelings for 30 minutes. That’s hard to come by in my busy life, so I took in every moment to check in. I thought about all the things that are coming up for me lately, emotionally-speaking, while David has been away working on a new show. I know many women whose husbands travel, and they do just fine. David and I have never been apart, and the kids have never been away from their father. I had so much anxiety about David leaving; I was not sure how I would handle it. I also had a lot of fear about the kids, and I wondered how their little minds would process Papa being gone. The truth is that I got so caught up in the “movie in my mind” of how difficult it was going to be that I lost focus on how I could be embracing the situation.

Sound familiar?

I hate to admit it, and I know MANY women will agree, but it hasn’t been so bad! One less person to take care of, a hell of a lot less laundry, I get to watch all my chick flicks on TV, I’m sleeping in my sweats while taking up the whole bed, and sometimes eating cereal in there which I totally enjoy! Don’t get me wrong, I’ve missed him terribly, but something about living alone is not so bad, LOL! On the flip side, I am having my lonely moments, they come and go, but for the most part I have surprised myself and I feel as if I grew up!

My point is that if we spend less time feeling fearful and anticipating the worst, we may surprise ourselves

Fear is a crazy, powerful emotion, and honestly I don’t like it one bit. The kids have amazed me too; I think I was sadder for them than they were for themselves. Isn’t that usually the case? So we are all good, and David is coming home soon.

If distance really does make the heart grow fonder, then it will be one hell of a romantic reunion when David gets back

Going back to “me time”, I know it’s nearly impossible with children, and especially a man, but if you can make it happen, it’s incredibly valuable. Checking in with yourself is eye opening; calming down for just a few moments every day can allow you to really hear what is going on. Btw, writing it all down is great too. When I write my blogs, it takes me to a deep place and it’s really good. I do casual all day long, so for me, I need it. I know as Mommies we are last on the totem pole, but don’t get totally lost