I have survived 4 successful days without the baba… That’s my son’s pacifier. So far so good. If you read my recent NY tantrum blog you can imagine how I was at my wits end. As soon as we got home I committed to ditching it cold turkey. Six months ago I limited his baba time to the crib and the car. The problem has been his constant desire to get in his crib and go to sleep so he could have it. His teeth are also taking the shape of a child who undeniably has been sucking a pacifier too much! The whole time in NY he wanted it, he was carrying around his blanket, dragging it on the floor, and both quickly became a germ fest! I figured it’s never going to be easy and I really wanted to kick it before our European holiday this summer. So here’s the story I came up with.
I decided to tell him that a monster, a BIG RED MONSTER came at night and ate it! He loves monsters, so this was not a scary thing. In the morning, I began telling my lie, and David said, “he just put his baba in his crib, who are you trying to fool?!?” Well there went my fantasy…so I resorted to what mommy intuition told me in the 1st place, the tender truth. “Your baba is gone, no more baba, you are a big boy now. Remember in NY I told you that when your baba broke we would be done with it. Buzz Light-Year doesn’t have a baba, Papa doesn’t have a baba. You’re a big boy now.” That was basically it, then I quickly changed the subject and handed him his favorite toy, Buzz Light-Year.
Surprisingly, he asked for it only a few more times later in the day. At naptime he became sad and said, “I need my baba mama.” I told him that I know and I understand, there is no more ba ba and I love you. I held him, kissed him, encouraged him that it was ok, and that was that. He asked again at bedtime – I went through the same dialogue, David told him again how Papas and Buzz Light-Year don’t have ba bas, and Shaya got it.
I am sooooo shocked that it was that simple. I psyched myself out that I was in for trouble, and it was actually easy.
I am so happy to see Shaya free to talk, and play, without being glued to that dumb pacifier. None of my other children took one, so it has been a frustration for me all along. I gave it to him, because he really enjoyed it, but when it became too much of an issue, it was time to break the habit. I am so proud of him. I have heard many great, creative stories that families have used to separate from the pacifier. Good old-fashioned honesty worked for my son. Surprise! I also think it helped to limit his use several months prior. I also told him a lot that I couldn’t understand him when he had it in his mouth and we were not able to talk. It was harder to encourage all that than it was to just get rid of it. Now if I can only get him to stop biting his sister!!! Confession, I didn’t really throw it away, I hid it in a great place, just in case (bad mommy move I know!) but I was so nervous.
I am curious why no one has given us moms a comfort toy to erase all of our troubles? Or better yet, a baba to buff the pre-tweens. Imagine if you could hush your teenager for ½ hour instantly? What a concept…