I am confessing that I have snuck back on to the bus while my daughter’s 4th grade class enjoys the last event of our Sacramento field trip. The sad thing is that she probably hasn’t noticed that I’m missing. It’s been 2 days of visiting our State capitol, site seeing, gift shop raiding, and panning for gold. I think I have spent a total of ½ an hour with my daughter….Aghhhh the sad realization is that my kid is too old to want to hang out with me.
Actually, I am not taking it seriously, I am here for her and she is doing what she enjoys. In fact, the usual group 10 yr old girl struggles broke out this afternoon and I tried to preach the importance of personal space and allowing friends to do the things they want to do. Caring enough to actually allow friends to interact with other friends, without being possessive, what a concept! I have a few grownups of my own that have missed that message. 
My daughter has a way of wanting to control attention, and that just doesn’t work in life. It goes much deeper though and I realize the constant fight for time in our house with four kids. Then I thought about my own feelings, my commitment to be on this OUT OF TOWN fieldtrip, being away from my other children, and not really getting any quality time with my kid…then I decided to practice what I was preaching to my own child and take it to heart. 
There are so many great lessons to learn from our own kids. It’s not about me on this trip; it’s about my daughter and my commitment to her. I hope she will look back and remember that I was here, at least I will and I feel good about it. To top it off, I didn’t even get to room with her in our hotel last night! But I made the most of that opportunity and slept for 8 hrs uninterrupted!!!! That’s invaluable for me. I thought of David and the kids at home, all snuggled up in bed together. I knew he’d be up at least 2 times that night, possible kicked in the face, and woken at the crack of dawn. That was my scene for the last 2 months while he was in Africa. Knowing he was home with them, Neriah was in a nearby room with her girlfriends, and I had a bed all to myself seem a bit odd. But I drifted off to sleep content with a smile on my face. My family is in order, and we are all doing what we need to do.
It’s so great to have David back. He is home with the kids. I feel so much less guilty being here. Our relationship is total pitch and catch, I truly appreciate it. These days when I am so busy, it’s comforting to know Papa is home, for me and our children. We really try to pick up where each other left off. Even my older kids do their part with my younger ones. It does take a village!
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