Do you ever just have one of those I suck days? I do – a lot. Actually I have had an I suck week! Oh crap, that’s right it’s only Monday, it can only look up from here right? The dishes are piled up, the clothes are starting to smell funky, the babies need a bath, the big kids look right through me, the husband’s moody, and all I want to do is go to sleep, but #5 took a late nap and she is ready to play. Yaay, me!!
Sometimes I ask myself, why can’t I be like the mom down the street? You know the one, she drives a cute little car, always looks like she stepped right out of a magazine, her kids clothes match and their hair lays flat, her front porch is decked out with super cute decorations and she always has a smile on her face. I realize that she is probably smiling at me sympathetically, because she has heard my voice waft out of my house while I am yelling at the kids to JUST LISTEN!!! It’s when I see the mom down the street that I get down on myself and come to the conclusion that I just plain suck. But, I ask you this…Is the mom down the street real or is she the image in which we all model ourselves after? Sometimes the grass looks greener on the other side because they just had it sprayed for weeds.
Too many times, I set unattainable goals as a wife and mother. I create an image of what I need to be, but the problem is the image I have created for myself is unrealistic. I spend so much time trying to perfect my every move and thought, that I miss out on all the imperfect perfection around me. I worry too much about what others may think, because I know that this world is full of people waiting for me to fail. Sadly, a lot of those “fail” watchers are other mothers. I am ashamed to admit that in the past I have been guilty of this.
Through all the self loathing, I have to try and remember the foundation that I have built my life on. The foundation that ends my pity party, my faith. My faith tells me that I am wonderfully and fearfully made (Psalm 139:14), I am perfect in God’s eyes! I am told to have patience, to be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger (James 1:19) I have been told not to be anxious and distracted with my daily chores, but to choose the good portion of my day wisely and it will not be taken from me (Luke 10: 38-42). And finally in everything good and bad I am to pray, give praise and be thankful (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18).
So tomorrow when I start my day, I will thank God for the blessings he has graciously bestowed upon me. I will smile at the mess in my house because it means I have a home. I will take joy in the laundry that needs folded because it means that I have clothes to wear. I will enjoy the art of cooking because it means that I have food to give my family. I will love my husband through his moods that put Christian Grey’s to shame, because it means that I have a man of honor and integrity, because he is still standing by my side. I will laugh with my children because without them I wouldn’t have meaning in this crazy, scary world. I will not tear other mothers down, but instead I will build them up and rejoice with them in their successes, and I will be there when they need a shoulder to cry on. I am wonderfully and fearfully made, I AM A MOM! Welcome to the hood – motherhood that is.
Lessons from the hood~
- Some days are just plain ugly, but sleep is beautiful and it wipes your slate clean!
- Every day is a new beginning.
- I have to learn to choose my battles.
- The only person I have to be better than is myself.
- Every day that I am hustling, every day that I am struggling, is another day that I am living!
- Remember to thank God always, if he brings you to it, he will make sure to see you through it.