One of the greatest fears that surfaces with divorce is the fear of being alone. Whether its the fear of growing old alone, sleeping alone, eating alone or just plain being alone, the depth of fear it evokes can be debilitating. There is no other time that this is more pronounced than around the holidays. Negative fantasies about how the holiday season will be spent can spiral any newly separated or divorced person into a panic attack.

Separation and divorce is traumatic for the whole family, yet each person within the family will have a unique experience when it comes to dealing and healing from this life transition. Learning to honor and respect each family members emotional response to the separation and divorce is an important part of moving on in a healthy adaptive way.

Theres a Chinese proverb that says You can hardly make a friend in a year, but you can lose one in an hour. David Arquette did that last week when he went on national radio and spoke about his separation with wife Courtney Cox.

The decision to divorce is excruciating, and as we have seen recently with celebrities and supermodels, its not uncommon for couples to file and then reconcile. Supermodel Stephanie Seymour and publishing tycoon Peter Brant decided, after months of contentious court battles, accusations and millions of dollars in legal fees, to try and make their marriage work. They are not alone in the celebrity world of indecision with public figures like Larry King and Shawn Southwick who filed for divorce in April and halted the proceedings one month later.

The desire to discover new passions is usually influenced by major changes in life. Retirement, marriage, birth and divorce are all life-changing events in which new passions may become nurtured. Divorce can inspire a person to rediscover and pursue a dormant passion that was not supported by their ex-spouse, like landscaping or jogging, or discover a new passion. Not all people have activities they are passionate about; yet they feel something is missing in their lives. Activities that a divorcing couple was passionate about together may not carry the same passion individually as it did when they were together. In these cases, a person may be at loss about how to discover new passions. Thankfully, discovering new passions is possible. With a little openness, adventure and fun, any one can discover new passions that bring joy to life.