Five Common Pregnancy Fears That (Almost) Never Happen

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When you’re pregnant, it’s hard not to feel overwhelmed by all the advice you receive from well-meaning friends and family members. But don’t fret! ModernMom columnist Princess Ivana Pignatelli (she’s a real life princess, no kidding!) has written an amazing book to help expectant moms wade through a sea of information overload.

It’s called A Simple Guide to Pregnancy & Baby’s First Year and it has everything new parents need to navigate the stress of pregnancy and beyond.

Best of all, it’s super easy to read – it’s like having your best friend sit you down at the kitchen table and answer all your questions and concerns. Because seriously, who doesn’t have at least one or two moments of serious anxiety during pregnancy?

Below, Pignatelli shares some of the most common pregnancy fears that (almost) never happen):

Fear #1:  Let one rip, tater chip. 

The gas you pass (both SBD, silent but deadly, and LNS, loud not smelly) will combine into a new variety:  LAD, loud and deadly, and erupt in a long chain of farts right in the middle of a business presentation. Your boss is still snickering two weeks later, after you presented your Power Point with a Power Fart.  Jokes like “smell check” instead of “spell check” are making the office rounds.  You fear you’ve lost credibility with your co-workers and that now, during any presentation you give, the whole audience is awaiting the punch line, so to speak.  On the bright side: Be grateful you have brought humor to the office, and that this, too, shall pass.

Fear #2: Facial hair freak out.

Your downy beard that suddenly appeared in your first trimester won’t go away and will only get thicker and longer, until you will have to consider either coloring it, braiding it or naming it. Reality check: You don’t need to hide yourself in a tower like Rapunzel the Bearded Lady. Just wax it.

Fear #3: Why do my feet look like Andre the Giant?

By third trimester, you notice your feet seem to be growing almost as fast as your baby.  On the bright side: it’s the perfect time to treat yourself to a pair of gorgeous new shoes.

Fear #4: Oh crap, I’ve crapped myself.

What mom hasn’t worried that in the delivery room, we’ll deliver more than we bargained for? Here’s the beauty: you can blame it on the baby.

Fear #5: I’m going to be the world’s worst mom. I’m totally under qualified for this position!

Reality check:  Perfection doesn’t exist, except in one important point: you are the perfect mom for your baby. Though you may find yourself absentmindedly pouring your wine into your baby’s sippy cup instead of a glass, your house is chaos central and you’ve forgotten where you’ve put everything including your identity, the very fact you are wondering if you’ll be a good mother is a good indication that you will be.

A Simple Guide to Pregnancy & Baby’s First Year is available online through iTunes, Kindle and Barnes & Noble

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