The Only “Push Present” I Want Comes In A Yellow Wrapper
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The Only “Push Present” I Want Comes In A Yellow Wrapper

The other night in one of the childbirth classes I teach, we were talking about pushing and the moment that your beautiful child comes out into the world and is placed in your arms.

I was sort of choked up thinking about how beautiful the moment was when my first child was placed into my arms and how it made every minute of the 28 hour labor worth it. One of the moms asked me if I got a “push present” after I had each child. That is where my education of the “push present” began.

A “push present” is a nice gift that a new dad gives to the new mom after the birth of their child. Figures that a trend like this would happen after I get done having children. One jewelry store even created a slogan to market their diamond earrings around the new trend with the line, “She delivered your first born, now give her twins.”

What does the mom who delivers twins get? A pair of diamonds earrings and a nose ring? I stood there dumbfounded thinking that I missed an opportunity SIX times to get some jewelry out of my ex-husband.

After the birth of our first child, he went out and brought me back the most delicious cheeseburger that I have ever had. After 28 hours of labor, I was starving and it was like seeing an angel when he walked in with it. I slowly pulled the yellow wrapper from around the beautiful burger, taking in the smells of onion and meat and ate it in two bites. To this day I remember that burger. Up until today I was really content with that.

These moms were telling me about the “push presents” they were hoping to receive: a Louis Vuitton diaper bag, a flat screen TV, and diamond tennis bracelet. I could see the dads wince a little as they calculated the cost of diapers, a crib, a stroller, college tuition for their child and had to add a tennis bracelet to that for mom. I saw on a television show where the mom asked for a Bentley after the birth of her second child and got it! If I had asked for a car after my sixth I would have gotten the Partridge Family bus.

Maybe I am old-fashioned, but I thought giving birth was a gift in itself. Actually the real gift to me was the epidural, followed by the gift of giving birth. I thought that love, support, and help, both emotionally and physically, was enough of a gift. I never thought about registering at Tiffany and Co. Who am I kidding? I could just kick myself for not thinking about that!

We get bonuses at work for good performance, maybe these moms aren’t so far off by asking for a gift for a labor of love well done. I am sad to say that I will never know what it is like to take part in this new trend. I am DONE having children so there will be no “push presents” for me. I wonder what the statute of limitations is for going back and getting one, maybe I still have time to hit the kid’s dad up for one!

The most priceless gift I could have gotten is the treasured memory of that first night with my beautiful daughter in one arm, a delicious cheeseburger in the other, and her beaming father beside us. That is the only present I needed.


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