Last night I attended my child’s elementary school chorus Holiday show. There’s nothing that screams “it’s the holidays” more than an hour of traditional Christmas music sang by 6 year old little boys and girls. As all the parents gathered into the small theater, I couldn’t help become distracted by the bake sale… brownies, cakes, cookies (not to mention, really HOT dads). Knowing this might be the longest hour of my life, I purchased a few brownies to help get me through the performance. As I observed the way over-dressed and delighted parents, I couldn’t help but wonder: Is this an event we feel obligated to attend or is the love for our children so biased that we actually think we’re attending a concert comparable to that of a featured act at the Tabernacle Church? Who are we kidding? And to the women (and some men) still wearing Christmas sweaters with lighted ornaments attached to the sleeves… PLEASE STOP!

Okay, enough of the negativity. I settled into the third row with my purse packed with brownies and my cell phone set on vibrate (can’t bear to miss a call)… all the while convincing myself I can do this… for an hour, a really long hour.

The first song started, I was impressed that the children in the front row knew most of the words and actually sang on key! But was the boy in the in back row really picking his nose during “Silent Night”? Okay, I just completely lost my appetite for the 2nd brownie! I recognized one of the girls, she takes a ballet class with my daughter… she looked darling. She sang, she smiled… she lifted up her dress to adjust her tights… not once, not twice, but three times! The boy next to her gave her a look to let her know that was not appropriate. She replied by glaring back at him with her tongue out and followed it up with a flick to his shoulder… and still managed to stay with the music! Now that was impressive!

Most of the kids were well behaved and had memorized all the words to all of the songs. There were a few kids in the back that were just filling up space. Their mouths were moving but nothing was coming out. Kind of like a really bad rendition of a Milli Vanilli lip sync act. The kids that didn’t possess the musical talent were basically disguised by wearing Santa hats, dressed like elves, one kid was wearing reindeer hoofs and one little boy was waving mistletoe over the little girls in front of him. Just a side note: When I start dressing my kids like animals from a Christmas tale, please call me out and bring me to my senses! Where does one even buy fake reindeer hoofs?

I sat proudly as my daughter sang all the songs, even if during the blissful sixty minutes she played with her necklace, lifted her dress, sucked on her finger, twirled her hair, turned around and looked at her friend, A LOT, and then yawned about half way through!

I must say, this was the best performance I’ve ever attended and I really believe a star is born!