Romeo, Romeo wherefore art thou Romeo?
Okay maybe looking for Romeo is shooting a little high – I’ll aim for just a dinner date.
I have read every article ever written for exactly three years, 5 months, 4 days and 11 hours to be exact, about when would be the perfect time to get back into the dating world.
I have put it off, not wanting to cause my children any anxiety or stress by bringing someone new into this life that we are just now adjusting to. But I think the time has come where I can honestly say that I am ready to meet someone. It’s not that I have been locked up in my house like Rapunzel waiting for some Prince Charming to convince me to let my hair down. As a matter of fact, I have been out on quite a few dates. Just not many that leave a girl wanting to keep looking.
There was the guy I went out with who gave me a big box of oranges for Christmas. That was sweet, except as he handed it to me, he said, “I gave my ex-wife a third, I kept a third for myself, and here is a third for you.” Of course, I got the ones on the bottom that were all bruised.
Then there was Mr. Wonderful. He had lots of potential. He was kind, funny and patient. He made me laugh and smile. Mr. Wonderful brought me home after our third night out. I really thought this guy had great potential to really be a part of my life. He walked me to my front door and I sent the babysitter go home. All the children were sound asleep. He gently took my face in his hands for the long awaited goodnight kiss. I was sure I could remember how to do this, right? Kissing is like riding a bike. As he brought his lips to mine, I heard little Finn start to cry. NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! I told Mr. Wonderful I would just be a second and I ran upstairs to comfort Finn, begging him to go to back to sleep. Mommy needed a sweet kiss goodnight from someone who could spell their own name and could eat a chocolate cookie without getting it all over their face.
Within seconds Finn was back asleep. I ran back downstairs and tried to get back into the moment. Mr. Wonderful’s lips brushed mine and he held me close. “WHAAAAAA”….I was hoping Mr. Wonderful would be so caught up in the goodnight kiss he wouldn’t notice. But he noticed. I ran upstairs to beg and plead with the sleep fairy to please get Finn to go back to sleep. This child has not woken up fussing in 6 months. Why now??? I lovingly tucked him in and patted him back to sleep, singing a song about how much mommy wanted a kiss from Mr. Wonderful. He snuggled back down and went to right back to sleep. I fluffed my hair, did a little primping and as gracefully as a mother of six kids who is desperate for a kiss can, went down the stairs. As I got to the bottom of the stairs I noticed that Mr. Wonderful was not there. I looked to see if he was in the kitchen, the bathroom, the hallway, the closet, under the dining room table, in the garage, under the couch cushions, etc. You would have thought I was looking for a teeny, tiny leprechaun. As I went to go look in the driveway to see if his car was gone, I noticed that taped on the front door was a note. It was written in purple crayon on a page torn from the coloring book that had been lying on the stairs. The note simply said, “You have your hands full, maybe when things slow down.”
I never heard back from Mr. Wonderful, and three years later I know that things will never slow down. But now even my kids are getting involved in trying to get me to date. Aidan had a plan to set me up with one of her friend’s dad. The problem is she didn’t tell me. When the dad dropped her off after picking the girls up from a movie, he came to the door to meet me. It was 10:30 at night, I had just gotten out of the shower and had on my flannel pajamas and no make-up. We’ve never had a second meeting.
Then there was the priest the kids wanted to set me up. They like him because he knew how to play basketball, and they explained it would be natural to call him Father since everyone already did. I see their logic…but I think the Vatican has a thing about their priest’s marrying a divorced woman with six kids.
I finally gave in this past Saturday night and went out with a friend who just got separated. I about fell over when she said we couldn’t go out until 8:30. Really??? That’s when I’m ready to wind down.. and we even went somewhere that is for the “older” crowd. Slowly people started to filter in. At 10:30 the band started to play and I laughed as I noticed the “younger” crowd moving forward to hear them and the “older” crowd moving towards the back. I’m officially in the back! They sang a few songs and said, “Here’s a great hit from long ago.” I didn’t even know the song, not because it was from before my time, but because it was from 1994, the year I had my first child and the year I gave up cool music for the sounds of Barney the Purple Dinosaur.
As I was standing in the back listening to the band play the “oldie from 1994”, my son called and asked me when I would be home. It was 10:37. He said they missed me. I asked him how a special late-night treat of some burgers and fries from the fast-food joint across the street might sound. Suddenly I was in everyone’s good graces again. 20 minutes later I was home with the late night snacks and there was not one single person telling me I needed to get out and date. We stayed up until after midnight talking, eating and making a pot of chili for the next day.
With or without someone in my life, I can honestly say that I love my life. Maybe Mr. Right is in my future or maybe there isn’t supposed to be a Mr. Right in my life. So what if I’m a single mom who is in her pajamas at 10:30 at night or a single mom who enjoys hanging out with my kids over hanging out in a bar. What fits right now is being in the moment with my kids and eating fast-food in our pajamas late on a Saturday night.
In those rare moments when I wish I had a Mr. Wonderful in my life, I am going to hold on to the fact that in time, if it is meant to be, the right person will come into my life and love everything about it.