I am going to let you in on a little secret – breastfeeding did not work out for me.
There, I said it. Please do not be confused….I know that I am writing about breastfeeding, and I also know where I am going with this.
Don’t get me wrong, I really tried to breastfeed my first baby. I had consults, help from friends, spent hours on the phone with the lactation people and the night nurses on call, expressed milk, pumped milk, and shhhh’ed my mom when she kept saying “that baby is hungry.” But, after a few weeks of trying and trying, my little guy was dehydrated and needed Pedialyte in the doctor’s office. Now, I’m not writing this to start a battle between the breastfeeders and the bottle feeders, so please reserve all judgments (both sides).
Apparently, I don’t make a lot of milk. That’s it. I had a big eater on my hands, and I could not keep up with his needs…so to speak. At the time, I felt like a tremendous failure (hello- hormones raging) and basically, bottle-fed my oldest son in the closet. Bottom line is that breastfeeding did not work and I needed to feed my baby. But mostly, I felt alone on an island.
Why am I bringing this up now? At the moment, I am feeling as crazy as I did during that time period except this time it is my business and I am not bottle-feeding, but rather force-feeding. I want results now! I want my Google apps set up 3 days ago. I want my website totally perfected a month ago. I would like my product at market. I would just like a manicure and pedicure. AND, guess what? I have to pick my boys up from school in 40 minutes!!
Just like my boobs couldn’t keep up with my son’s need to eat as a baby, I physically cannot keep up with the expectations that I put on myself. Now, I know that I have come so far in such a short period of time and my mom is so proud of me and blah-blah-blah. BUT, my nails look awful; my disclosure page on my website is giving me an error message, and I am in a very in-between stage of product development.
The difference is I do not feel alone on an island this time. Instead of panicking in the closet, I reached out to my mompreneur friends and they jumped into action. They offered – want to chat? want to Skype? To all of you (you know who are) – thanks for taking the time to understand my business, my pursuits, the level of discipline that all this requires, and supporting me.
As I finish this up, I think that I need to bottle-feed this baby (I mean business) a little bit. A few ounces, every few hours, and eventually, I will accomplish my dreams. You know what happens when you over feed a baby – SPIT UP – and I definitely do not want my business to spit up.
Note – I wrote this last week as I was flying out the door for school pick-up. It is off the cuff and real, but not meant to offend anyone. I promote babies eating no matter how you choose – breast or bottle. I also still need a mani/pedi.
