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Surviving Sixteen Years and Six Kids

July 31, 2014 by Julie Cole Leave a Comment

I recently celebrated my 16th wedding anniversary to Daddy-o. When I say “celebrated,” I actually just mean that we both “remembered.” It has been a busy sixteen years and I’d be lying if I said we’ve actually remembered all of our anniversaries. Usually we are reminded of this special occasion when his mother calls to offer congratulations.

People have asked how we’ve survived 16 years and six kids. I could say all the usual healthy relationship tips: don’t go to bed angry, appreciate each other, say “I love you”, make time for each other, communicate honestly and often, blah, blah, blah. All this marriage advice is useful and we probably do them for the most part.

What I really think has been useful is some of the advice that was given to me.

Before we were married, Daddy-o’s mother sat us down and said this: “Just so you know, there are not going to be hard days, hard weeks and hard months – there are going to be hard YEARS. If you can just work through them it will all be worth it.”

I also remember what my brother says: “If the grass is looking greener on the other side, try taking better care of your lawn.”

Now don’t get me wrong, I don’t actually think people should be miserable with their spouse for years, and certainly some people take very good care of their lawns and still can’t avoid those poisonous weeds. Ending a marriage can sometimes be the very best thing for a family. Only those in the marriage are qualified to make that call and decide how to fix a relationship. But, I think these messages have been good reminders to me that relationships were never meant to be easy all the time and that part of my responsibility is to work on it.

One thing I do know is that the guy who posted his dissatisfaction with his married sex life online last week should have kept this dissatisfaction to himself. I doubt it helped his marriage and I’m certain it won’t lead to him getting more action in the bedroom. So if nothing else, my relationship advice is DON’T DO WHAT THIS IDIOT DID.

You’re welcome. You can thank me for saving your marriages henceforth.

What keeps your marriage/relationship going strong? Did you get any good dating advice that has helped your partnership?

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Filed Under: Relationships

About Julie Cole

Julie is the mother of six and a co-founding VP of Mabels Labels, the leading provider of labels for the stuff kids lose!®. After her son was diagnosed with autism, she shelved a legal career to monitor his therapy and launch a business that would strike a better work/life balance. Mabels Labels has grown from a basement start-up into an award winning international phenomenon. It has been featured everywhere from The View to Forbes.com and is widely recognized for its business and product excellence. As company spokeswoman, Julie is a well-known personality amongst mom entrepreneurs and her dynamic personality has led to numerous speaking engagements, from morning TV to university business classes. With humor and candor, Julies writing focuses on her experiences raising a big, happy family while running a successful business, and has appeared in Chicken Soup For the Soul - Power Moms and numerous websites. Follow her on Twitter @JulieCole Julie Cole
www.mabelslabels.com

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