In today’s nonstop world of business meetings, kids’ activities and household chores, it’s hard to make time for sex. Add to that the pressure to perform on demand (as if it were a scheduled meeting) and sex can all but disappear from a relationship. But before you and your spouse get to this point, take a few minutes to learn how to make time for sex and rekindle the passion in your relationship.
Stop over-scheduling your days! Yes, the children have activities and business meetings have to be attended, but at some point it is imperative that you and your spouse spend time together, alone. The world is not going to stop revolving if you and your spouse spend an hour or two together. We promise. You can even use the time the children are at their soccer practice or other activities to be together.
Flirt with your spouse often. Make your relationship fun! Many therapists and websites suggest that flirting and keeping the emotional connection with your spouse is an important step in keeping sex alive in a relationship. Place a sexy, inviting note in with your husband’s lunch or leave him a naughty voice mail that hints of things to come later. Simple gestures like these let him know you are still interested in being with him and can’t wait for time alone.
Plan a Date Night
Plan a date night. As corny as it may sound to some people, it is the number-one suggestion of many therapists and professionals. ThirdAge.com and NetDoctors list this as their top priority for couples with hectic schedules and children. Although it may seem strange in the beginning to have to plan time alone with your spouse, it will soon become a night that you both look forward to. This is your night; the children should have a sitter or be with friends and the business phones should be turned off.
Step Outside the Norm
Step outside what you and your spouse consider the norm. Using the results of flirting from Step 1, plan quick, intimate interludes. Perhaps a lunchtime visit home or even to his office, if he has a private office that locks. Making time for sex involves more than just making time; it also means rekindling the desire you shared before kids and busy schedules. For example, using tips from MamasHealth, if Grandma says she’s dropping by to take the kids for ice cream, use this time to head to the bedroom and rediscover each other.
It Will Save Your Relationship
Make time for sex first, not a last-minute before-you-go-to-sleep, five-minute routine. If you feel sex is nothing more than a chore, then you and your partner are going to suffer. Make time for intimacy and make sure it is more than a five-minute quickie that you feel obligated to perform. Making time for sex can be paramount to saving your relationship.