Tori Spelling certainly proved herself to be anything but a spoiled 90210 mommy. At eight-months pregnant with her second child – a daughter! — she trooped out to Baskin Robbins in Burbank, California to commemorate Bump Day, when all pregnant moms get a free soft-serve ice cream. Wearing a beyond-chic Diane von Furstenburg dress – ?It?s not maternity,? Tori cooed. ?I just bought one size bigger than normal and had the dress altered a little? – she glided around on kitten heels, and elegantly swirled soft-serve treats for the crowds, wowing a congregation of pregnant moms who came to celebrate motherhood, ice cream, and, well, Tori!
The vivacious 35-year-old mother of Liam, 14 months, and wife of actor Dean McDermott first graced our screens as a child, appearing on such shows as The Love Boat, Fantasy Island and T.J. Hooker, produced by her iconic father, Aaron Spelling. But she found national fame on the 1990s television hit, Beverly Hills 90210, as determined high school virgin, Donna Martin. Since that 10-year run, Tori has stretched her creative wings, not only starring in but also producing such shows as So NoTORIous, Tori and Dean: Inn Love, and the much buzzed about, Tori and Dean: Home Sweet Hollywood (premiering on June 17, on the Oxygen channel). ?I love going to work everyday on my show because I don?t have to leave my family — they?re all part of the show,? Tori tells Modern Mom. ?I never have to leave Liam or Dean. It?s like a dream come true.? She talked to us about designing a pink princess nursery for her coming daughter, eating pizza in bed, and the most important things her famous parents, Aaron and Candy, taught her about parenting.
What’s your definition of a Modern Mom?
A modern mom can be anything she wants to be. For so long, there was this perception of what a mom is and always these limits about what she can and can?t do. I feel like now that I am about to be a mom of two, that I can do it all – and I love it. I don?t think a modern mom has to compromise. I don?t think you have to choose career or family. You can have both. I never believed that until I was full blown in the middle of it. But I haven?t compromised for a second with my son. I know I?m in a very fortunate position. I know a lot of moms aren?t. But I think I?ve found a great balance.
I also think men now really step up. Dean is the most hands-on dad I?ve ever seen. All my girlfriends have husbands who have stepped up too. I think this really empowers women to take her career back, do what she wants to do and still be a great mom and a great wife.
What’s your secret to balancing career and family?
My secret? Well, I?m very fortunate because I?m on a reality show with my family. I love going to work everyday because I don?t have to leave my husband and son. They?re all part of the show. It?s like a dream come true because I get to be with Dean and Liam all day. I rarely have to leave Liam. I could see doing my show, Tori and Dean forever in some ways.
But I?m the kind of actress who likes doing all kinds of roles. So I don?t know if I?ll always want to do something that has to do with motherhood. As a working actor, being a mom is definitely something I take into consideration. It?s now not just me, it?s my husband and son, and soon to be daughter. I can?t imagine just jetting off to do a film without them for three months.
What did your parents teach you about parenting?
My parents gave my brother and me a lot of love. What I did learn from my parents growing up is that sometimes love is not enough. There are so many other things involved…you need to listen, you need to communicate. I think we didn?t have as much open communication as I would have liked. So what they taught me is something I would like to incorporate into the family I?ve created – an open line of communication. It?s very important for me to have family dinners, and for us to talk about everything.
What do you want to teach your children?
Acceptance. That?s very important to me. I think I grew up in town where acceptance is very hard to come by. I turned 35 this Friday and self acceptance is something I?ve come by later in life. You have to accept yourself in order for others to accept you. So that?s very important for me to teach my children to love themselves for the individual they are.
Who do you admire the most?
Probably my husband. He?s been an angel throughout this pregnancy. I don?t think I could have done it without him. I didn?t anticipate how hard it would be physically — having a 14-month old and being very pregnant. And I know there are a lot of single moms out there, God bless them! But I can barely carry Liam. I?m really exhausted, and working a lot. So having Dean there by my side, he?s my strength. He?s my rock. When Liam wakes up at 5 in the morning, I?m thinking, ?Oh my God. . .? And before I can even put a foot out of the bed, Dean is up. He?s got the bottle in one hand, the diaper in the other. And I just think, ?Oh, I love you!?
What’s your favorite family activity?
Nap time! I think we all benefit from that! I was never the type who took naps. And now there?s Liam. And I realized, you get it when you can get it – the sleep. Because the reality of sleeping ’til 9 or 10am on the weekends is no longer the reality when you have a child. That?s something from the past. And nobody tells you that before you have a kid. Otherwise I would have appreciated it more! I?m a late sleeper – I always loved being in bed until 10, even 11am. And nobody tells you that you will never do that again until the kids are 18!
My favorite thing is when we take a nap altogether, the three of us. When Liam is nestled in our arms, all cozy, and he?s all sweaty! And I can nibble on his warm, little arms.
What is your greatest achievement?
Having my babies! Definitely. Nothing compares. I just stare at Liam every single day. I hope I don?t give him a complex! I keep wondering if he?s thinking, ?Why?s this woman staring at me?? I can?t believe that he came out of me, that I gave him life. Men can be fabulous fathers. But I feel sad for them sometimes because they will never know the joy of creating a life within you. I could cry right now!
And now, the second time being pregnant, I appreciate it more. The first time I was always thinking, ?I don?t feel good,? or, ?Oh, I?m getting so big.? You focus on what?s happening to you. But when I had Liam, I felt a loss – he wasn?t inside me anymore. This time I appreciate every little kick, every little moment. I talk to her. The best part of being pregnant is I never feel alone.
What product can’t you live without?
Biosilk Hair Serum is amazing. It?s a serum for your hair, for frizzies. I?ve got curly hair. The great thing is it smells great but it?s not overpowering. And you can use it on your skin. I never leave home without it. I carry a mini one in my purse. At any moment, you have something that makes your hair look amazing — you have a body moisturizer, and a perfume, all in one.
What do you do when you’re feeling selfish?
I like to eat in bed, all my favorite foods! Right now, I?m craving pizza all day. Or I like to make myself a sandwich. I like to take my food, snuggle under the covers and watch reality TV!
What’s keeping you busy these days?
How long have you got? I?ve got so much going on! My show, my pregnancy, my family, I?m getting the nursery ready!
I?m doing the nursery myself. I?m obsessed with doing it in pink. Every girl wants to think pink. I have the book, Serena & Lily: Nursery Style, which I love, and it?s giving me inspiration. And I?m looking at Serena & Lily bedding now for the crib. Dean really wanted a princess nursery, and I?m into modern. So we?re trying to mesh the two into a chic, modern, princess, girly-girl nursery. It?s not done yet – stay tuned!