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Spoiling on a Dime

June 30, 2011 by AGoto Leave a Comment

Not too long ago, one of Ava’s little friends shared a secret with me, “My mommy says that Ava gets whatever she wants.”

Some parents may take offense to this, but it’s not exactly untrue.

Ava has a lot of stuff. She has a complete drum set, three guitars and a keyboard. She has enough Superheroes to end the war and she could hold a fairytale rodeo with the amount of unicorns she possesses. They come in a variety of sizes; the smallest one accommodates Batgirl whereas Ava can ride the largest (and most freakish) one. Not kidding. My favorite is her recently acquired Build-A-Bear unicorn. It wears a kimono, strap-on wings and pink, high-topped roller skates, which makes perfect sense in the Build-A-Bear world of infinite excess.

But it’s easy to spoil Ava with a herd of unicorns when I’m not shelling out hundreds of dollars to do it. That’s right, I buy stuffed animals second (third and sometimes fourth) hand at yard sales. My sister thinks it’s disgusting. I think it’s recycling.

“Aren’t you worried about bugs?” she asks.

Not so much. As a general rule, I buy the freshest fare, free of boogers and visible lice. There has been a time or two when Ava has latched on to a particularly well loved and deeply stained creature with matted hair (a sure sign of disease). In that instance I give the animal a Tide with Bleach bubble bath as soon as possible. But for the most part, I don’t consider a child’s stuffed animal to be a harbinger of pinkeye. Besides, there are bigger things to worry about in life, like classroom bullies and Sarah Palin. Furthermore, if you’ve every seen Ava’s lovey–a balding, spit-covered monkey named “Muh” who has been an active participant in every runny nose and stomach virus Ava has ever experienced–you wouldn’t worry about a handed-down unicorn.

Taking my child to yard sales also has its advantages. I have her ask the price of items, which usually gets us the best price. If not, I’ll make a big show out of it, saying to her, “Oh, that’s way too expensive,” which is her cue to produce the most forlorn, someone-just-shot-Bambi look. Sellers who catch on to our act retaliate by giving Ava things for free–you know, the crappy stuff that no one in their right mind would buy, like a Barbie with ballpoint pen tattoos and hair matted into a mohawk. Needless to say, we travel with hand sanitizer.

Ava has been at this so long she knows how to spot a deal.

“Mom! Pyrex!” Something I never thought I’d hear a 5-year old say. (Yes, I have a strange addiction to vintage Pyrex that rivals my daughter’s infatuation with all things Pegasus.)

Scouring yard sales has become a Saturday morning family tradition. But I’m starting to see the downside. For every $60 Build-A-Bear I get for $3 there are 20 free pen-faced Barbies. And in the name of recycling, my daughter is starting to acquire too much, which only means one thing: it’s time for a yard sale of our own.
 

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About AGoto

Andrea Goto writes The Culinary Coward, a monthly humor column for PaulaDeen.com about her struggle to become a domestic goddess, or more simply, to cook an edible meal. She writes her own Blog, Mom Without Makeup, which discusses the messy art of modern mothering. Andrea lives and writes in Savannah, Georgia, with her 5-year old daughter (who thinks she's a superhero), her husband (who is a superhero) and one geriatric cat. Andrea Goto
www.andreagoto.com

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