Painful sex & pregnancy don’t need to come together, according to the March of Dimes and the Baby Centre. Most women can safely have sex throughout their pregnancy. Some expectant moms are likely to enjoy sex even more while pregnant, due to the increased blood flow to all areas of the body, including the pelvic region.
Some expectant moms are likely to enjoy sex even more while pregnant, due to the increased blood flow to all areas of the body, including the pelvic region. For others, however, sex may feel different than it did before pregnancy. New sensitivity, body changes, nausea, fatigue, anxiety or pressure in the pelvic area can all affect comfort and desire.
If you are searching for answers about painful sex pregnancy concerns, the most important thing to know is that mild discomfort may sometimes be related to position, dryness or pressure — but sharp, severe or ongoing pain should not be ignored.
Causes of Painful Sex During Pregnancy
Vaginismus, a condition where a woman tenses her vaginal muscles due to fear of being hurt from intercourse, can cause painful sex during pregnancy, according to Net Doctor. A woman experiencing an ectopic pregnancy also may suffer pain during sex; ectopic pregnancies happen when a fetus rests in a fallopian tube and not the uterus, according to the Mayo Clinic. Such pregnancies must be medically terminated, or the woman risks losing her reproductive organs or even dying as a result. Problems with the cervix or untreated infections, such as pelvic inflammatory disease, can also cause painful sex during pregnancy.
A woman experiencing an ectopic pregnancy also may suffer pelvic pain. Ectopic pregnancies happen when a fertilized egg implants outside the uterus, most often in a fallopian tube. Mayo Clinic notes that an ectopic pregnancy cannot proceed normally and may cause life-threatening bleeding if untreated. Warning signs can include pelvic pain, light vaginal bleeding, shoulder pain, fainting or severe abdominal pain.
Problems with the cervix or untreated infections, such as pelvic inflammatory disease or sexually transmitted infections, can also cause painful sex during pregnancy. Hormonal changes may also lead to vaginal dryness or irritation, which can make penetration uncomfortable. In other cases, the discomfort is not caused by a medical condition at all, but by the pressure of a growing belly or a position that no longer works for the pregnant body.
When Position Might Be The Problem
Some women can experience painful sex during pregnancy due to their lovemaking position being all wrong. As the body changes, positions that were once comfortable may suddenly feel awkward, too deep or too physically demanding.
Woman on top is a great way to enjoy sex during pregnancy while controlling the depth of penetration in an effort to avoid pain or discomfort. This position can also allow the pregnant partner to control speed and pressure, which may make sex feel more comfortable.
Also, side-by-side intercourse, perhaps the spooning position, can alleviate any unwanted feelings of pain or bodily pressure. Spooning can be especially useful later in pregnancy because it reduces pressure on the belly and may feel less physically strenuous.
Another great position to try during pregnancy is getting on your hands and knees. But keep in mind that this suggested position probably won’t be too comfortable during the third trimester, when your belly is usually rather large.
Warning Signs to Take Seriously
A few women can’t safely have any kind of intercourse during pregnancy. Not only can serious pain result, but also premature labor and, in some cases, even miscarriage. If your doctor has noted that you have a high-risk pregnancy, you should avoid intercourse during pregnancy and opt for alternative intimate activities, such as cuddling and sensual massage.
March of Dimes recommends calling your provider or going to the emergency room if sex during or after pregnancy is followed by heavy bleeding, leaking amniotic fluid, painful cramps or contractions.
You should also contact your doctor if painful sex during pregnancy is new, severe, persistent or accompanied by fever, unusual discharge, burning, bleeding or abdominal pain. While some discomfort may be easy to solve with more lubrication or a different position, pain is still your body’s way of asking for attention.
Painful Sex by Trimester
Sex is more likely to be difficult or even painful during the third trimester. By this stage, your belly is larger, your body may feel more tired, and certain positions may put too much pressure on the abdomen, back or pelvis.
During the first trimester, symptoms such as morning sickness, breast tenderness and fatigue can thwart potential sexual pleasure. Even if sex is not physically painful, desire may be lower simply because you do not feel well.
Usually, pregnant women who stay sexually active enjoy intercourse the most during the second trimester. Nausea may begin to ease, energy may return, and the belly is often not yet large enough to interfere with comfort. That said, every pregnancy is different, and there is no “right” amount of sex to want or have during pregnancy.
Prevention and Comfort Tips
Foreplay and adequate lubrication are always a good idea to make sex pleasurable rather than painful, but they must be placed as a priority during pregnancy. A water-based lubricant may reduce friction and make intercourse more comfortable, especially if pregnancy hormones have caused dryness.
Open communication with your partner, especially about what doesn’t feel right during this time in your life, is another key to avoiding unwanted pain during sexual relations. Pregnancy is not the time to push through discomfort or pretend something feels fine when it does not.
If intercourse is uncomfortable, couples can still remain intimate in other ways. Cuddling, kissing, massage, oral sex if approved by your doctor, and mutual affection can all preserve closeness without causing pain.
Painful sex during pregnancy can be upsetting, but it is also common enough that you should not feel embarrassed bringing it up with your doctor. In many cases, the solution may be as simple as changing positions, slowing down or using lubrication. In others, pain may be a sign that your body needs medical attention. Either way, sex during pregnancy should be based on comfort, communication and safety — not pressure.
