If you are unhappy in your current relationship, you have probably given some thought to divorce. Before you make that final leap, though, you should carefully consider whether divorce is your only option or whether you might be able to salvage the relationship if you both worked together. At certain times, divorce is definitely the right answer–such as when you are in an abusive situation. In many other cases, however, the lines are a bit blurred, and you may not know if it’s right for you.
Talk to your spouse about your unhappiness. In many cases, one half of a couple has no idea that the other is unhappy in the relationship. Your spouse’s reaction to your confession may signal that it’s time for a divorce. He may also be unhappy in the relationship and want a divorce. He may also say that he’d like to make changes to save the relationship.
Count the number of fights you have in a week. While there is no magic number of fights you might have, doing this will make you aware of how often you fight with your husband. If it’s more fights than you want to tolerate, it may be time for divorce.
Make a list of the pros and cons of a divorce. When you’re unhappy, divorce may seem like the right solution, but there are also consequences. You will have to deal with custody and financial issues, for example. In some cases, the negative aspects of divorce may outweigh the divorce itself, especially if you can work with your partner to make the marriage work.
Enter marriage counseling with your spouse. If your spouse is open to the idea, you can attend counseling sessions with a professional, which can help you to work out the marriage issues. While this may not save the marriage, it could help solidify whether divorce is right.
Determine how much love you still have for your husband. You may feel sad or betrayed by something that he did, but you still love him. If you love him, you should try a bit harder to make it work.
- Don’t decide to divorce immediately after a fight, when emotions are running high. Instead, think carefully about whether divorce is really the right answer.
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