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Advice on Love & Engagement

July 27, 2010 by ModernMom Staff Leave a Comment

For many women, engagement–and, ultimately, marriage–is the goal of their relationship efforts. Getting engaged is an exciting proposition for many women who desperately want to find the man that they want to spend the rest of their lives with and to enter their white-picket-fence-happily-ever-after world as soon as possible. If you are on the brink of engagement, you might have some potentially troublesome issues on your mind.

Significance

There comes a point in every serious relationship where talk turns to marriage. Some men, eager to start a family, welcome this talk, while others, still holding on to the last strings of bachelorhood, fear it with the same passion as some reserve for a pandemic outbreak or brain-eating zombies. If your man seems apprehensive and fearful of having “the talk,” consider what this fear might mean for your relationship. Some men overcome this hesitancy, while others are truly not ready to commit. If, after numerous attempts, your boyfriend doesn’t want to talk about your marital future, engage in a frank discussion and ask what his intentions are. While this conversation topic may seem like a turn off, if he doesn’t really want a future with you, you deserve to know that.

The Ultimatum

Many bling-hungry women get restless as their impending engagement approaches and begin to become impatient. This impatience is even worse if the lady is partnered with a man who is dragging his feet. Often, women in this situation choose to give their partner an ultimatum. While this ultimatum may seem like an uber-controlling move, it is actually not that uncommon. According to the “New York Daily News,” 1 in 10 couples have set a time limit on when they will get engaged. When deciding whether ultimatum setting is right for you, determine how long you are willing to wait for your man to pop the question. If your clock is ticking and you don’t want to continue to sit on the singles bench, an ultimatum may be right for you.

Misconceptions

Some women think that their partner will like them better if they attempt to be the perfect girlfriend. This added affection, they hope, will lead to the much-desired sought-after proposal. However logical this argument may sound, it is actually false, according to “Cosmopolitan Magazine.” Many men report that they picked their fiance because she was original and different. So, trying to fit into that perfect girlfriend mold may actually keep you single longer.

Asking for Your Hand

While asking for a girl’s hand in marriage use to be an expectation, the practice is continually to wane in popularity. According to The Art of Manliness website, men today can opt to ask or not to ask. If you have always dreamed of your guy having that heart-to-heart with your dad, make your desires known so that he will feel more compelled to visit your protective pop and ask that all-important question.

Engagement Length

After they get engaged, many women, whose heads are full of images of lace and crinolines, want to run down the altar. While there is no set engagement length requirement, “USA Today” reports that the length of time that the average American remains engaged before walking down the aisle is actually on the increase, with most couples waiting 16 months from the “Will you?” to the “I do.” Once you finally have that ring on your finger, don’t rush it. Instead, enjoy your engagement and your time with your partner.

Photo Credit

  • engagement ring image by jimcox40 from Fotolia.com

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