If you can’t remember the last time you had sex with your husband, it’s time to take stock of your marriage and determine what’s going wrong. Counseling can help you become closer to your partner and to reignite the spark that you once had. Determine whether counseling is the right step for you.
Significance
Differences in sexual desire can contribute to your relationship falling apart. It can signify deeper troubles, such as a lack of emotional connection or stress. If you don’t address the big gap between you, your relationship may end up in divorce. Marriage counseling can help you to work through these issues, become closer, and avoid divorce.
Benefits
Couples may have a difficult time opening up to each other. A professional counselor can help a couple to get their issues out in the open–you may learn that lack of sex is stemming from stress from work or stress from housework. Sex isn’t the only way that a couple can experience intimacy. Counseling can help you learn new ways that you can express your love–many of which will lead to a better sex life. Through counseling, you can grow together as a couple instead of growing apart.
Considerations
It’s a mistake to think that a sexless marriage is always one that is on the rocks. Some people naturally have a lower sex drive than others. If both you and your partner have similarly low sex drives, you don’t necessarily need marriage counseling to work on your marriage. If you are both happy in your marriage, don’t let outside pressures make you feel like your relationship isn’t good enough, because it doesn’t involve a lot of sex.
Time Frame
Each session will probably last 30 to 60 minutes. You may only need a few sessions to give you the techniques that you need for more open communication in your relationship. If you have a lot of problems in the relationship, you may need to continue counseling sessions for several months. Each situation is different, and the frequency and duration of your counseling sessions will depend on your situation. Some couples may meet with a counselor just once a month, while others should meet once a week.
Misconceptions
Counseling for a sexless marriage may not solve the problems in your marriage. It may reveal deeper problems in your marriage that you feel are unsolvable. For example, you may learn that your partner has lost interest in you sexually and has been seeing someone else. Go into counseling with an open mind and with the intention of fixing your marriage, but understand that some marriage problems cannot be fixed.
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