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How to Stand Up to Your Husband During Divorce

November 29, 2009 by ModernMom Staff Leave a Comment

During divorce proceedings, men may bank on your emotions getting the best of you and keeping you from fighting for what is rightfully yours. All too often they are right. Many women do just back down in order to avoid the conflict and arguing. They just want it to all go away. The problem with that is that it will all just go away and you will be stuck with nothing in the end. On the other hand, if you know how to stand up to your husband during your divorce you can get through it with your pride and bank account intact.

Step 1

Consult an attorney. This will ensure that you are prepared for the proceedings and understand what to expect during the coming months. According to Plan for Wealth, you should consult with an attorney concerning your husband’s current income and even any bonuses he might be due in the near future; this information can help you decide if you want to wait to start proceedings so that the money becomes community property. This is simply standing up for your rights and what you deserve as a partner in the marriage.

Step 2

Ask for what you deserve. Your husband wasn’t in this marriage alone. You contributed, enough if you were a housewife and mother. Stop giving in to everyone around you and, as described on Good Witch Bad Witch, stop thinking that your husband will automatically do what is fair. He most likely won’t, he will be going after everything he can get and so should you. Stop giving in.

Step 3

Stay focused and positive. Mtlaw.net lists this and staying healthy as two important steps in standing up for yourself. If you allow yourself to become depressed or discouraged you will be more likely to cave in to your husband’s demands and not stand up for what you deserve. Understand that the divorce can be slow and you have to be prepared to stay in for the long haul.

Step 4

Keep communication open with your husband, even if it has to be through an attorney. According to Mtlaw.net, communication between spouses makes the divorce more civil and shows your husband that you are not just going to walk away quietly. Keep your attorney informed and up-to-date on any communication so he can determine if it is appropriate and how it can affect the divorce.

Step 5

Remember your life and any children involved are depending on you to be a strong, assertive woman who will fight for what is right. Often, simply showing that you aren’t going to back down is all it takes to get the message across. For instance, if you want joint custody of the children then be clear about your needs and don’t let your husband bully you into relinquishing your rights.

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