Ever take a minute break, perhaps at your desk or while folding laundry or driving your kids to and from school and wonder what attracted you to your partner? Can you remember what you used to do before you had kids? What do you miss about those days?
If you are like many moms, you forget. It happens to all of us–you’ve got work to do, dinner to make, dishes to clean up, kids to bathe, and tuck into bed. And the fun starts all over again tomorrow! Who has the time or the energy to think about the guy sleeping next to you?
You do, that’s who! Investing your precious time and energy on your relationship matters to you, and your entire family. A happier, healthier and stronger couple raises happier, healthier, and more successful kids! Yes, your shadow as parents sends an enormously powerful message to your family.
For many of moms, the answer can be as simple as a date night, yet taking the time to find a sitter, plan a date, write out the kids schedules, get dressed (who knows what’s in your closet that fits), along with everything else that needs to be done before you walk out the door can be so daunting that many parents chose to just stay home. Yet what’s missing is the fun, the spontaneity, and excitement.
It’s up to you to “Live the Life You Want Your Kids To Live!” if you want your sons and daughters to enjoy a dynamic, fun, and loving partner relationship when they are older, you need to show them how it’s done, today. You need to make time for each other, go on dates, laugh, and enjoy each other.
It’s up to you to “sell the dream” of what raising a thriving family looks like right along side nurturing a loving partner relationship. Parenthood is work, sure, and it’s also tons of fun!
If any of you saw Date Night, the movie, I’m sure you saw reflections of your life throughout (I sleep with a retainer, too), but the most important message to me was that the couple Tina Fey and Steven Carell, had a weekly date on the calendar. I know some of you may be thinking that sounds easier said than done, but it isn’t. Get your pens ready for a few strategies to make it happen.
1. Tell you hub that you are excited to spend time together and that you are on a mission to make this your best summer ever- together!
2. Find a sitter that can sit for you on the same afternoon/evening each week. Book her for the summer. Keep the date!
3. Take turns planning the date or you’ll start to resent being the organizer all the time. A very cool book to make planning easy is “ 1001 Ways to Be Romantic” by Gregory J.P. Godek. The message in this book is that you don’t need a bunch of money to have an amazing time together
4. Go away together. It might be to the hotel down the street, or to a dream destination, but once in a while- maybe annually or bi-annually, take time to focus on each other without the demands of children greeting you at 6a. There is nothing like it for rekindling your love and desire for one another.
5. Have Fun together!! There is no better way to role model the joys of raising a family than living a happy, healthy, joy-filled life as a couple. Laugh, spend time together and teach your children how to raise their future families while nurturing a loving relationship in the process. You can absolutely have it all!
6. Make it a great summer!