I’m planning my 11-year-old daughter’s birthday party. I’m happy to realize that she is less interested in the big, themed events as she gets older. Now she hits me up for small slumber parties, girly girl activities and expensive presents. She gets the NO card on the extravagant gifts, but I do let her help plan her B-Day celebration. This year it’s all about fun fashion.

First stop today was the hair shop to pick out some fun accessories for the girls. Thanks to Steven Tyler, and of course Beyonce who rocked the hair tinsel at the Grammy’s last year, my girls are obsessed!!! I’ve had my own feather envy watching Steve’s funky style on American Idol, and yes I did pick up a few for myself. It was Rain’s own individual style that trumped my own as she picked out a fuchsia clip-in hair extension and a pink and purple feather accessory.

I suppose it is my fault since she has shared many hours keeping me company in my dressing room while I get ready for work. She loves makeup and dress up. The question is, how much is too much, and are her wishes getting out of hand? I love the element of dress up. My girls love it too, and I actually appreciate their sense of fashion. They have a dress code at school and must keep everything natural. Whew! But, when it comes to free time and fashion play, we have so much fun! I always tell my children how naturally beautiful they are, and more importantly that inner beauty is what matters most.

Last night after my makeup artist left, and I was ready to head out to a press event, I walked down the stairs and my 8 year old said, “Eeeeew Mommy, you look scary!” Hardly the reaction I was hoping for before I walked the red carpet. But, she likes me the way she sees me when I wake up and drop her off at school, and I appreciate that.

At the end of the day a trip to the nail salon with 5 11-year-olds for manis and pedis may seem a bit extravagant, but it is her birthday and almost anything goes on that day. BTW, a trip to the salon is much cheaper than a catered b-day bash for 22 kids and their parents. I’m not worried about my children’s perception. They know what is necessary and what we do just for fun. After all, they see mommy leave the house in sweats, flip-flops and a ponytail. I come home from work with fake eyelashes, extensions, and stilettos. It’s a dream gig, but I truly feel my best and have my most beautiful moments at home being my naked self.

For more on beauty and my concerns raising 3 girls in a glamorous industry, read my “Beauty Deconstructed” chapter in The Naked Mom.