I was waiting in line the other day at a coffee shop where a nice looking, youngish couple were in front of me. I thought nothing of them until they turned to leave and I was floored by the party favors dangling from the fella’s nostrils. The guy had so much nose hair, I was surprised it didn’t get stuck in his teeth. As I continued to picture him flossing with it, I realized his girlfriend/sister/cousin, who ever she was, needed to throw him a bone.
Men notice big boobs; they notice girls they think are checking them out (note: they are not checking you out, you knobs); they notice fast, expensive cars and what time the golf is on. That is it.
How they can shave everyday and NOT notice their nose hair is beyond me, but their stupidity is not what this blog is about. It’s about how it has become our job to inform them it’s there and that it is not okay. It’s actually grounds for divorce if they do not clean up their act.
Go, do it right now, I’ll wait for you.
Another major issue I have, maybe because I’m a picker (yes, I troll my face in a magnifying mirror every now and then. How else am I going to know that I need laser on my chin?) is big blackheads. A friend of mine has one so big on his cheek it looks like a peppercorn. Argh, I feel sick thinking about it. It’s my goal this week to tell him, since no one else in my family is going to do it, and so I have no choice. I have been pre-occupied with it actually, I’m wondering if the pore will return to its original size?
I feel like ear hair is obvious, however, I see this a lot too. I guess what irks me the most about men and their body hair, is that the man doesn’t look bad, just stupid, but the woman he is with – she knows it’s there and is trying (impossible) to ignore it. She looks bad and a bit desperate. As soon as I see a dude with some nose hair, I think, “why hasn’t his girlfriend told him to trim that sh*t?”
I know it’s a double standard. If I walk around with a hairy chin, or mustache (both of which I have lasered, NEVER wax. EVER) you think anyone who notices would blame my husband for not highlighting it? Nope. I know his lack of attention to detail is his problem, however, I can’t help myself, I think we need to rid the world of nose-bush.
So who’s with me? Lets do this. If you see a man today with some crazy hair growth do the honorable thing, point and stare until he is shamed into trimming.